I was watching and listening to a video about blogging today when I realised that something wasn’t right. Abnormally, I was struggling to concentrate, my notes weren’t really concise – I wasn’t paying true attention to the video and learning from it. I was doing ‘just to do’ rather than because I wanted to. I was so grateful when my lunch break came along. I went out to get some fresh air to try and work out what was going on. And then I realised; I was feeling fear, I was scared.
What is fear? According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary it is; an unpleasant often strong emotion caused by anticipation or awareness of danger, or according to the wonderful Urban Dictionary; Fear is the mind killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration.
I think these two quotes are perfect for eachother as the former describes what it is, but the latter explains how it feels. The real issue is that no matter what it is, fear causes havoc in our lives unless we can learn how to master and face it. Think a moment about what you have missed out on because you were too afraid of… (insert here – common examples are; failure, not being good enough, rejection, embarassment, being judged).
In my fear today – I was afraid of multiple things at once; failure and looking like an idiot, of not being ready for what I was trying to do, of not being good enough, of jumping above my station.
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do – Eleanor Roosevelt
FEAR: also known under the acronym of False Evidence Appearing Real.
In learning to confront fear, in Part One I ask you to ask yourself one question – is it based on truth?
This is what I was afraid of: failure and looking like an idiot, of not being ready for what I was trying to do, of not being good enough, of jumping above my station. For each one, take it – and ask yourself if it is really based on truth. When you have an answer, keep probing until you feel the fear dissipate.
Could I fail? Absolutely. Many times, over and over. What then? I would learn from it and grow. I would try again or do something different.
Would I look like an idiot if I failed? Only idiots themselves would judge me that way – I’m doing a good thing here.
Am I ready for what I want to do? No, I’ve got tons to learn, and do to reach where I want to be, but each step is a step in the right direction.
Am I good enough? You always have been and always will be perfect right now.
Am I jumping above my station? No stations exist, you will become what you decide to become. If you dream little, you’ll get little in return. If you dream big – you’ll get there. Simple equation.
Questioning and facing my fears relieved them of their duty. I realise that they are there to protect us, but there is no real danger right now, in fact it would be more dangerous for my own sanity if I didn’t carry on doing what I absolutely love doing. That would be disastrous. Stay posted for How To Confront Fear – Part Two.
Start a huge, foolish project like Noah. It makes absolutely no difference what people think of you – Rumi